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I often come across many who seem highly skilled at telling me the all reasons why they do not work. They can tell me, “I don’t have success because of [A,B,C]!”

I then ask the questions:

  • “So, using all that knowledge, how do you GET work?”
  • “You know why you fail, but do you know HOW to succeed, not what happens with people who feel successful?”
  • “Are people ignoring you?”

I ask questions for the simple reason that being negative is easy. It takes no action. If you are not taking action to not climb over obvious obstacles that is your reason for failure.

However, being ignored is different because you are trying. There are those who simply destroy any chances of getting over obstacles through one or all of these “5 Best ways to get yourself ignored online”.

#5 Contacting a possible client hoping they will figure out what to do with you

It works like this: You are taking a chance that someone will be stunned by your brilliance and invent a reason to work with you. The problem is that you don’t know why you should be working together and you contacted them anyway.

Why does it get you ignored? It looks like you do not do your homework. This makes as much sense as sending a job recruiter a resume and hoping they will hold onto it for that 1 in 10000 chance they remember you when a job opens up. You stay working by contacting people who need you, not by expecting them to know what you had in mind when contacting them. I can think of people and companies I made this mistake with, and what I came to realize about working online is that “not everyone needs everyone’s services”. The best bet is to not waste people’s time.

True story: In 1996, I spent nearly $5000 sending my first demo to every casting director, agent, and school in New York City. (I am not kidding) No one wrote me back or called. I had no luck finding interest until I contacted people who could use exactly what I offered, and it was a much cheaper way of working. Believe it or not, the same applies when working online.

#4 Adopting a “Here I am!!!” attitude when contacting clients or businesses

Is your style of writing emails, blogs, or newsletters for marketing a bit too self-centered? How do you feel when talking to a person who can only talk about him/herself? Are you happy about the chance to “meet someone new” or “talk about yourself?”

Why does it get you ignored? Simply put, it can be exhausting to deal with a person who may be displaying a sense of insecurity or desperation by constantly making statements of “self”. In general, people are happier for “being remembered”, not because they had the chance to listen to stories of your greatness. Try this next time you write an email to a client: Start the email off with a compliment about something you saw them do, and make the email more about, “There you are!!!”

Side note: Have you ever been to a restaurant that knows exactly what you like to eat and where you like to sit? Point: You feel special when you go there, and that’s where you spend your money. 

#3 Writing toxic messages to people via email or social media

I do not blame Facebook for providing a platform for people to express any thought at random, but it does make me nervous how such a platform is largely successful. I do not blame email for “flame emails” that knock me off my seat. On the flip side, I do know LinkedIn is more popular for people “trying to do business”, and this is why I use it more than other platforms.

Why does it get you ignored online? Misery certainly breeds company, but it’s the type of company that is always fleeting or festering. The true path to getting work, or accomplishing anything, begins with positive thought. Taking actions with a negative mindset leads to negative results. 

And all that aside…No one likes to feel like your personal punching bag for when you are in a bad mood about something that happened to you. Online toxicity, to date, has solved no problem for anyone and did more to shed light on those who may have self-destructed for even a moment. We are all human beings and have real emotions, but the last 7 years has shown me the Internet has no place for toxicity.

#2 Speaking online before one should have spoken

The dirty little secret about working online is that 78% of what you read should not be trusted, but it has to be written anyway for the purposes of promoting a business. Real education comes from things we do offline in the real world when we seek to learn outside of what we found on “how to” blogs and Youtube videos.

Why does it get you ignored online? You have created the persona of “expert” for yourself, only. Oddly, if all the information you possess has been acquired online, and it has become what you believe in, you are less likely to be listened to because it seems you only know what people tell you. So, when you speak it becomes obvious that you only read what others think, and adopted that as your opinion. The content you read is just as visible to those you contact.

Side note: Get around this by being original. I have stayed employed the last 17 years largely due in part to show myself as someone willing to listen and learn, before offering advice. No one knows everything.

#1 Expecting something for nothing from complete strangers

In a way, we can maybe blame Google for this, as they created a business that makes millions of dollars, yet still appears to be free to the common user (even though it is technically not). Maybe we can blame the often-sold belief system that “to get what you want, you have to act like you deserve it!”. Maybe we can blame the glamorization of stories where people did something REALLY different to get discovered and hired.

These “results not typical” examples are often misinterpreted. The end result has been people often contacting each other in the belief that asking for something free is just a risk we all should take. For example, I once had a woman mail me baby pictures with a small note attached, “Put my child in your next voiceover project.”

Why does it get ignored online more than anything else? There is a difference between ‘pitching an idea’ and ‘asking for something free’. Human beings still operate on the laws of reciprocity. Taking the example from above: Why should I help a person who mails me baby pictures? Not only is it creepy and weird because I do not know the person, but what sort of reciprocal value exists in putting a complete stranger’s baby in a voiceover project (which by the way is impossible).

Note: No one is “given success” or “put into successful scenarios”. They earn those chances.

Finally…The ONE TRUE WAY to get people to pay attention online:

Work your tail off, even when others try to talk you into quitting, or claim your intentions are negative.